


The voice in the past that will always be

by mysV



Category: Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order (Video Game), Star Wars: Rise of Empire Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Boba is there to help, He just don't know how, Jedi Culture & Tradition (Star Wars), Jedi as Found Family (Star Wars), M/M, Post-Order 66 (Star Wars), Psychometry, Seizures, The Force
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 16:28:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29246583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysV/pseuds/mysV
Summary: “I’m so furious at you.” Boba didn't turn to look at him, his hold on the blade didn't relaxed.“I know,” The Jedi stretched, feeling the familiar ache in his muscles. His neck burning, his arms, hands and shoulders were already starting to bruise. “I’m sorry.”But Boba, this isn't my fault, he thought.
Relationships: Boba Fett/Cal Kestis
Comments: 1
Kudos: 44





	The voice in the past that will always be

**Author's Note:**

> Well, I love Cal, and since him and Boba are perfect together, I just wanted to contribute a bit more in Kesett fandom. However, Psychometry also is endlessly fascinating to me, so I described it as good as a I can. Time continuity is a bit messy, but it is to point out how confusing such ability could be. 
> 
> English isn't my native language, but I hope didn't many misspelings and grammatical mistakes this time. 
> 
> Enjoy!

**Disclaimer** : Star Wars and all of its affiliated properties remains property of Lucasfilm and Disney.

* * *

When he was a kid, he’d had a couple bad experiences with his psychometry—actually, every single psychometric he know sometimes had bad experiences with their ability.—The Jedi Shadows, many of whom share this gift with him, suffer from them, too. Anyway, that is what he expect to be once he becomes a Master. As a Shadow, he could give people answers that only can be found in the past, as a Shadow, psychometry will be his ally as much the Force already is. 

Meantime, he still have to work to keep it under control.

"It is just a little mistake, Cal, it could happen to everyone, even to Master Vos." Padawan Secura had told him once, when she was in crèche duty, voice soft and reassuring. She had always being nice to him, and patient with his apparent difficulties.

But Padawan Secura, inteligent and capable as she was, couldn't had helped to get him through this. 

Not even his Crèche Master. 

Not even Master Che or Knight Erin. 

Sometimes, only Master Windu, Master Yaddle or Master Yoda could help him, and that should be scary enough. The Force was powerful, let their children untrained, and they could be ignorant of it, of what it gives, of how it works, they way It hold all together. Past, present and future are one in the Force. 

Luckily, Cal Kestis is surrounded by people who know how to help him, how to teach him correctly. 

* * *

_"I can help you if you want."_

_He turns to look at Boba, all armor, and heigh and guns, focusing on him like he used to do, and say. "I don't need help, I can do this alone. I'll do it."_

_"But you're not moving, are you?"_

_He scoffs, sounding almost like a petulant child. "No, I'm not."_

_"If you didn't need help, then you would have done it by now." Boba answer, and his voice suddently sound like it comes from far away, not from where he is standing, almost at his side._

_"If you stop talking to me and leave me alone here, I will. I'll do it. I want to it."_

_"Sure, do as you kriffing want, if you end up in trouble, then you know where to find me"_

_"Get out of here Boba, there aren't another bounties in the Galaxy you should be looking after" However, everyone was aware that Boba Fett's support and loyalty came with a price._

_"Is for your head they will pay more, di'kut."_

* * *

He remembers one time, it had happened when he was sleeping in his mat. That day, they were out in a excursion, and he didn't knew which object or which place triggered the memories, but he had been dizzy, sad and grumpy the rest of the day. 

Then it hit him like a mudhorn, memories that were not his own, many of them, and any of them were pleasant. It was too much, too much for his young, little mind. 

And too much for his own young, little body. 

* * *

_He can feel the world spinning around him, tingling in his hands and feet, head pounding, and he can tell another seizure is coming. He can't die like this. He can't die like this. He tells himself, he's got dignity. The feelings he always has before them have started again. He lets himself fall, feeling warm arms surround him as his body contorts and convulses, the pain ripping a shriek from him._

_Him? Who is him? The Youngling hiding in the Council Room, minutes before he got murdered by a glowing red blade? Is the the Padawan who saves Senator Organa, despite of his own life? Is him Knight Vebb, running through the Healing Halls and trying to save as many as he can, before the blaster comes? Who is him, or her, or them?_

_"Cal? Cal!" There is someone, there is someone keeping his head from hitting the ground. This man, his hold, all of him feel so hard. This man wears armor and speak through a modulador. A droid, then? Or a man? The medic droids were nice, he remembers, they even caress your hair to make you feel better. A gentle caress on his hair, he feel the man warm hand running through his hair._

_Maybe Master Che could let this droid care for him while he is in the Healing Halls._

* * *

He wake up in the Healing Halls, warm and safe, tucked in a white blanket with colorful dots, the kind of blanket everyone knew was preferred by Master Che when she had to treat younglings.

Force, that blanket was the best blanket of all the Galaxy, people in Bracca couldn't even believe that such a blanket existed. 

It took him a while to notice the Bacta Patch on the back of his head, barely above his nape.

How did he even got hurt there, they sleep in mats, the floor was right there. 

* * *

_"No, leave me alone!" He barks, he listen to himself while he do it, but everything is still dizzy and the whole world is on fire, the burn coming from inside his body. So, if the world is on fire, why is the man in armor trying to help him? Master Rancisis was right there and nobody was helping him, nobody was there to fight against the other men in armor. He despites all of them, Bracca's acid rain can pour over all the men in armor, is not like he cares._

_"Shut up! Do you want them to find us, I still can leave your here and go on with the thousand of credits your useless head is worth." The man growled at him, voice low and almost distorted. To him, Cal must weight as much a starving Tooka, because he throws him over his shoulders and start walking away._

_Away._

_Away from his home._

_Again, men in armors are keeping them, the Jedi, away from their home._

_"Leave me alone! You bastard, all of you, put me down and get out of here!" Cal speaks through clenched teeth, his hands itch for his lightsaber and the Force feel tight around them, trying to press down on this entruder. The Force is your ally, and poweful ally it is, Master Yoda always told them that, and Cal know it was not just a saying, but a fact._

_The Force is your ally, and a powerful ally it is. Caleb used to rimind him that, everytime he felt like he was drowing on his own mind._

_Caleb._

_Caleb Dume._

_Where is he?_

* * *

“Well, Cal, I'm not sure, but at least the scar looks cool,” Caleb offers. His voice is guarded, something rare on him, unsure if he’s supposed to comment on Cal’s injury this soon after it has occurred. 

Cal can’t see said scar without a mirror, but he knows what it looks like. Jagged tendrils of lightning emanate from a deep gauged crater right under the nape of his neck, an everlasting mark of his latest stint as a memory catcher. 

“Yeah, it’s dope,” Cal agrees, to put Caleb at ease. In reality, every time he brushes the spot with his fingers, he’s reminded of the most terrifying moment of his life, but he doesn’t want his friend to walk on nuna's eggshells around him forever. 

Master Gallia, the one who brought him to the Temple, once told him that she had been scared because she didn't know if he could stan this power the Force has given to him. She said, her expression gently, that he was a quiet baby, too quiet to anyone confort, actually. His mind had a tight hold on him since he was just a newborn, and without Master Gallia, who received a shaking little boy in her arms and accept him as her own, as one more member of her family, Cal wasn't sure if he would even be alive. 

* * *

_The next time Cal woke up, he was laying in his bunk, with Boba sitting next to him, half of his armor still on and playing with a vibroblade's edges._

_“Hey,” Cal mumbled, tired, his voice scratchy._

_“I’m so furious at you.” Boba didn't turn to look at him, his hold on the blade didn't relaxed._

_“I know,” The Jedi stretched, feeling the familiar ache in his muscles. His neck burning, his arms and shoulders were already starting to bruise. “I’m sorry.”_

_But Boba, it isn't my fault, he thought._

* * *

Anyway, even the worst times in his past didn’t compare to this. If it meant he could ditch this current heavy, ominous uncertainty, he would go back in a heartbeat to crying for out loud for his Crèche Master and for Master Tapal, for Master Yeddle and Master Che, for Aayla and his friends. Back at the Temple, back at his home, there would be people there for him, worrying for him, trying to make it better.

Now, though, the dull ache from his ever present Psychometry is someting he deals with alone. However, everytime he is gloveless, his head hurts with painful anticipation.

**.**

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! The title of this work was taken form the song "I'm the voice" by Celtic Woman. I think this song descrives both The Force and psychometry pretty well, so you should try and listen to it. 
> 
> :)


End file.
